今天，你上网了。我好开心！看到你的名字出现在我的朋友名单中，好兴奋哦！抱着开心的心情，开始按上你的名字，希望能和你多聊几句，谁知道，你尽然还没说两句，你就走了。为什么？你再忙吗？不可能，不可能。我唯一想到的答案，唯有你不想看到我，听到我甚至连看到我上网也恨不得把我赶走。
为什么？我会相信你说你还喜欢我，想跟我在一起，但却还没准备好。为何呢？为何我这么的傻？有时我会恨我自己，我很想不去怀疑你，但是，当你那冷漠的对待我时，我又不知道你说的是真心的吗？我很害怕。我害怕5年前的事又再发生。我不等待你，到后来才发现我爱的是你。也发现到，你也是喜欢我的。当时后悔的心情，我不想再有。我不要，不想也不愿意。。。你教一教我，我该怎么做？？
wow! i hv been teaching in SJK Yeong Sing for a week d…it’s a nice school wif only small number of student. 1 class only hv 24 students and 1 standard only has 2 classes. i was the class teacher of std 1 B.wow.the students are brilliant..got a big different from town. they really respect u as their teacher and follow wat u ask..not like in the town,those student will argue wif u …aiks..sometime really angry wif those student who are biadap..haha…
experience of teaching in small school is really different from wat i taught last few months in big school, though it is far from my haos…it’s really nice to teach there…parents respect u, students respect u and even, less work load….haha…
hopefully i will continue to get job after this thursday as im going to stop from teaching in SJK Yeong SIng, what ever school it is, it is a brand new experience for me..im looking forward for it…
love,
kaichur
i was clearing my cupboard just now.found something that really sweet and make me smile..A lot of letters, letters written by my friends, lisuan,liyuan,fonyi,qiushi,and also you…i found 1 letter written, if no ppl want u, i wan…so sweet. deep in my heart..how many years passed,5 years…i admit that i still have the strong feeling on u..that day u say can u pikat me?i was so happy though i never show it out to u,u say gv u some time,i will noe the ans soon…im really looking forward for it…i look at my hp everyday,but it never rang and show ur name since tat day….wat had happen?
i m waiting for it…
love,
kaichur
jz recieved a news that my fren’s mother passed away,well, my another friend was crying so badly,i was nth happen like tat…mayb it’s because im not very close to that fren,so no feeling at all. any way, i can strongly feel that,life is uncertain.
it’s just like when my dad passed away, that time i really cant accept it,wat a ridiculous joke tat the god had made towards me n my family.luckily,i hv a dozen of good relatives,my aunts,my uncles,my grandpa,grandma,they really gv alot of suport to us and let us go through the sorrow.besides,dhamma also help me alot in going through the period in fact.i read a lot of dhamma books on that time,tat time,i was only 11 years old,but i already realise the uncertainty of life.i have accept it…
then when my 1st uncle and my grandpa passed away,i was sad,but not tat much.becoz i noe that’s a release for them as they have been suffer for a long time from sickness….
anyway,i really hope tat my fren can overcome everything strong and stronger…u can make it…as we are buddhist….
love,
kaichur
it’s kinda tired when jobless…Y? nth to do oso tired?yaya…kinda tired…who says i hv nth to do?i gona do house chores in house, drive my siblings to here n there, wat no job?jz ahmad n ah 4 mar..haha…well,it’s kinda bored wif the life now..nth meaningfull i can done,i try my best to read some book,but,cant ….haiz..
wat a meaningless life here…i really hope to receive a call from PPD and ask me go to teach…teaching is my hobby now i should say….i love teaching….
haiz..
love,
bored kai chur
这是怎么一回事？人往往都会在失去后才会懂得珍惜。失去了，才是珍贵的。没失去的，就像一根毫不起眼的小草。我常常都是这样，失去了许多东西。到后来，才知道，原来我很在意。我妈妈最近不知道为什么，好像担心我会孤独一生，常对我说，：“我给你执照了，可以开车了”相信大家还摸不着头脑吧。就代表，他终于开恩啦，让我谈恋爱了。我应该开心才对，因为之前因为他的执照还没到手，开始了一段短短的恋情，却因胆小，怕他知道后会怒发冲冠，所以，就这样，没了。到后来，有人追求也不敢开始。到最后，失去了一大堆。。。
有时候我在想，使我谈恋爱还是我妈妈呀？为何我会那么的懦弱？连一场属于自己的恋爱也战战兢兢的。到现在为止，就算妈妈已给了执照，我还是不敢。我怕。怕什么？我也不清楚。
暗恋一个人好难，爱一个人更难。这是我常听朋友们说的。
到底是我懦弱吗？还是真正的缘分还没到来？
等待吧！
